It was early October, the heavy blanket of heat and humidity that plagues Atlanta’s summer was slowly lifting, bringing in cooling Atlantic winds. I felt on top of the world I had created for myself. I sipped coffee and directed foot traffic. The entirety of Peachtree was closed to insure the safe transport of  ”Le Tibre,” a giant Grecian sculpture first discovered in 1512. The sculpture was hidden in a giant white truck with police escorts. Media was everywhere, trying to catch a glimpse before the unveiling.  I felt like I was waiting at the gates to great the president, or the pope. People bustled around, talking in code on walkie talkies. I just stood their in awe at the moment.  I never crossed the Mississippi river but once,  and today I didn’t have to travel at all, The Louvre was coming to me.

 

Behind me stood a clean white building designed by Renso Piano. The building itself was sculpture. Inside paintings and antiques were being carefully arranged in preparation for our upcoming opening. I almost felt guilty-disrespectful, leaning on the pavilion. I wore a black cardigan with The High embroidered on it in red. My security clearance badge clicked and clacked against the building.

 

Men bigger than houses hoisted up the wooded box labeled ’fragiles’. With careful crowbars the men stripped the boxes of nails leaving the ply wood to fall to the canvass protected marble floor with a thud. And there it was. Le Tibre.  Moved only twice since its discovery almost 500 years prior, history is starring at me, like it has nobody else in the United States. I had never felt so small and so big all at once.

I remember every breath of that morning. It was the day my dreams came true.

life changes so much from post to post. I guess thats because there are weeks if not months between posting.

i find myself newly-mostly unemployeed. I have known for months that art would be over at Reynolds due to budget cuts designed to make our future society drab and sand flavored. but it came as a complete surprise last week when Collage announced they would no longer be doing children’s classes also due to financial reasons.

so here i am back to pushing the pavement like a mad man. I should be ok with freelance, and left over classes through the summer so I am gonna just work on what I have till the wedding. This gives me time to actually work on the wedding.

Elizabeth was here this weekend helping us work out our ceremony. I am feeling really good about that. She knows what she is doing. It was also nice to spend a few days acting like kids. Elizabeth is about 15 years older than me but she brought out the teenager in everyone. It was a lovely weekend.

i thought i had more to write here. maybe after some more coffee.

*Nat broke her foot leaving her helpless and in my care

*i went to 10 doctors appointments and spent 2 days in the hospital. only one appointment was mine.

*Llewela Grey Reyes was born on cinco de mio. Nia got very very sick.

*grandpa pete was given his last rights.

*my paycheck was lost in the mail.

*lizen got an infection from being on antibiotics

*Giuseppe also got a bad infection due to him being alergic to DOG FOOD.

This week:

My house WILL be clean

my paycheck WILL come in

I WILL have a great time with my sister

the weather WILL be great

my wedding dress WILL fit me.

the end.

The down side of being a “real adult” is working…. ALL the time. I say “real adult” because I realize I was of adult age when I lived at la france. Hell i even had a degree. But that version of adult and what I am now…. Not even a distant cousin.

Monday through Thursday I work at Reynolds middle school. I teach healthy cooking and comic books. I adore those kids even though I often lose sleep thinking about whether or not the world has a place for them.

Friday morning I do home care work for a friend of mine. She has Wegener’s granulomatosis.  I help her with random house hold thing, but I think mostly I am company for her.

Friday afternoons and Saturday mornings I teach drawing workshops at Collage. This leaves me one full day off.

Of course I have 2 dogs and 2 cats that need attention. A two bedroom house that needs cleaning. There are always dishes, errands to run, something wrong with the car.

I was talking about all this with Natalie over dinner last night. What exactly happened in these past few years that turned me and the majority of my friends into card carrying adults.  We contemplated many things that could have caused it as we sipped beer at Amnesia, a beer date scheduled days in advance….. Because everything has to be scheduled days in advance.

So here we are.  Adults.

my eley belly.

Eleanor is gone. Not that I was surprised that the Millers loved her. But when I called to check on her this morning, I broke into tears on hearing how happy she was. They told me she was perched on the banister with their other cat. The kids love her too. I want her to be happy…. but i wanted to be the one to make her happy.

I just have to suck it up and acknowledge this is best for her.  At least I have

Giuseppe Aloo the Whale

my dogs. I love them so much. I don’t think I have written in here about Giuseppe, but he brings a spark to my life that I can’t even explain. He can is tiny and loving and I bring him with me just about everywhere I can bring him. He has a growing fan base.

sigh. I guess on the plus side we are back at a reasonable number of animals at our house.

Eleanor RoseyveltKnowing I have to find a new home for Eleanor is breaking my heart. I had her since she was just a few days old. I woke up every 3 hours and bottle fed her. I showed her how to use the litter box. I rubbed her butt with a warm rag to help her poo. And now I am interviewing people to find her a new home.   She has been in a constant state of stress for months.  In her stress she pees everywhere and is so obviously unhappy.  I tried to give her her own room.  A private sanctuary, where the dogs can’t bother her. But she just cried. She was lonely. So I thought maybe she could live outside with Ares. He could show her the ropes. We live on a quiet street and she would have access to a warm bed in the garage. But she hated that too.

Its costing us 100s of dollars to repair the harm she has done to our house with her nerves. I want her to be happy. I don’t want her to be so nervous anymore.  She needs a place with no dogs. And I can’t give that to her.

I am interviewing a family in West Linn tonight. A family with another kitty and children in a nice home. I just gave her a bath so she could look her best. I am making a care package with some food and treats… her favorite toys.  I want them to fall in love with her. I want to know she will be happy. But at the same time I want them to reject her and send her back home with me.

For reasons i could never come up with I have been denied access from our Target wedding gift registry for a long time. I emailed to ask what to do. no reply. i called and after i got to the automated ”if you are trying to return a toaster from a Target in the Phoenix branch than pres 289…” I hung up.

But then something amazing happened. A bad ass pet hair destroying hoover vacuumed showed up at our door. If I was Opera it would be one of my favorite things.

But the poor vacuum had been through hell and back trying to find its way to our house. See on the registry it has our old address and we don’t live there anymore. As happy as i was that hoovy- thats the vacuum’s new name- made its way home, I really don’t have faith that the postal system will do us anymore favors

Lizen and I decided we should just go to target and get it fixed. At costumer service, the winner of the Seth Rogan look alike contest enthusiastically related to our grief . ” oh god man, so like you have a registry but you just can’t get in. woah. not cool.” He tried a few things on the computer and then finally called the target people.  After some confusion the person on the other end of the phone explained to not-seth-rogan that we were locked out of the account because the computer couldn’t process “partner and partner” despite the fact that there is a box to check for partner. It confused the hetro-puter.  Not-seth-rogan asked if I would be ok with being “groom” and lizen could be “bride.” I made a face. whatever.

‘Ok you should have access to your registry in about 6 hours.’ Apparently thats how long it takes for the sex change.

On the way out of Target I burped loudly. I can do that. I am a man now.

the past 4 months have flown by with such a quickness It barely occurred to me that the time passed at all. Its hard to say how these past few months really were. I have all the “big” things down pat. I have my beautiful lady. I have a nice home. A good job. I love me little fur buckets.

But all that aside the past few months have been hard for me. I have been getting very lonely and missing friends. I have made a good handful friends here in Portland, but I miss my family and close friends. Lizen has been having similar problems.

The wedding is looming around the corner like a monster I can’t tell is friendly or not. My friend Ellen laughed the other week saying i don’t act like other brides she has known. I didn’t really understand. But apparently I am supposed to care a lot lot more about shoes, colors, make up hair…. when honestly  i don’t.  Its not that i don’t care about my wedding. I do. alot. But all these little details are tiring, cumbersome and just kinda dumb. My sister is coming up in a few weeks to help me  with all these things i am “not doing.”

Part of me can’t wait. I can’t wait to see everyone. I can’t wait to celebrate my love .  I mean its the biggest party i have ever thrown and i am a founding member of the yule ball! But man, I can’t wait to stop budgeting for it, worrying about it. explaining why some people are invited and some aren’t. Every conversation with my mom or my sister centers around it. I am just done orbiting this event.

On the health front I went to the eye doctor yesterday. A. My Optometrist just had his movie picked up by a studio in LA. B the reason i can’t see in my glasses is because  MY VISION HAS GOTTEN MUCH BETTER. Does that even happen?

My therapist- yes i have a therapist- recently had me go to a phychatrist that specializes in EMDR. This does not  please me.  A. never good when a therapist feels they can’t help you anymore. B. if you look up EMDR i imagine your thoughts will be about the same as mine with a solid WTF.

Lizen thinks i am just not into trying new things- I am not denying the truth of this, but come onnnnnnn. I said I would go to therapy to “work through” this “horrible thing” that happened. But i would be hesitant to tell you that it has helped in any way.  All it has really done is make me think about said “terrible thing” a lot more than I normally would. And fork over my cash to talk about it.  Not my thing.

Anyway, not that anyone outside of Anne reads this, but I will try to be better about updating.

But I will leave on this note.

Being an adult- it blows.

keep a house that we can be proud of

eat healthier food

finish and publish Timothy’s Antlers

paint more

stay on top of wedding planning

make lizen happy

laurettta is better than every other cat.

 

earlier i went to move sul and his gross bone off the couch. no gross bones on the couch. well, sul growled at me. which is the biggest no no in the house. Lauretta, knowing that I am sorta a pussy and Lizen is an even bigger pussy, took matters into her own hands.

When he growled she flew out of no where and attacked him.

NO GROWLING AT MY MOMMY!!!!

Don't f*** with me, dog.

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